Memorial app: a quiet place to keep someone's memory

When someone dies, what remains is scattered. Photos on three phones and in a box in the attic. A voice message on a mobile that nobody dares to reset. Stories that live in the heads of five different people. A memorial app is a way to bring that together in one quiet place, so that the family can return to it, now and later.

This guide is for families who are thinking about that. It explains what such a place can hold, what is worth saving soon, and what can wait.

What a memorial app is, and what it is not

A memorial app keeps the memory of one person: their photos, their voice, their own words, and the stories others tell about them. It is a place to visit on a birthday, on the day they died, or on an ordinary evening.

It is not a public obituary, unless you want it to be. It does not replace a funeral, a grave or the conversations a family has. And it does not take grief away. It only gives memories a place where they do not get lost.

What to save first

Almost everything can wait, except the things that disappear on their own. In the first weeks, these are worth a look:

• Voice messages and videos on a phone. A phone that is reset, sold or handed back to an employer takes them along. Copy them to a computer or another safe place.
• A voicemail greeting. When a phone number is cancelled, the greeting goes with it. If you would like to keep it, call the number and record the greeting on another phone, before the subscription ends.
• Messages and photos in online accounts. Accounts can be closed or memorialised. Our guide on photos and accounts after death explains what Google, Apple and Facebook allow.

Everything else, the choosing, the sorting, the writing, has no deadline.

What a memorial can hold

• Photos from the whole life. Not only the last years. A child in a school photo, a young adult on a bicycle, a parent at a kitchen table. With a name and a year, so that later generations know who they are looking at.
• Their voice. For many families this is what they miss most. Even a short voice message about something ordinary can mean a great deal later.
• Their own words. Letters, cards, a recipe in their handwriting, a sentence they always said.
• Stories from others. Children, friends, colleagues and neighbours each knew someone slightly different. Their stories together make a fuller picture.

Gathering without hurry

It helps to start small. Choose one photo and write down who is on it and what you remember. Next week, another one. Some people find it comforting to do this together, for example on an anniversary, with a box of photos on the table and everyone telling what they know.

If you inherited many photos, our guide on sorting, sharing and keeping your parents' photos gives a calm method. To see which years are covered and which are missing, you can use our free photo timeline; the photos stay on your device.

Ordering the memories

Two orders work well. By life stage: childhood, youth, work, family, the later years. Or by theme: the things they loved, the places they lived, the people around them. Choose what feels true to the person. You can always change it.

Sharing with care

Not everyone grieves in the same way or at the same pace. Some relatives want to look at photos straight away, others not for a long time. A private memorial lets each person come in when they are ready. Invite people one by one, and let them add what they remember.

Questions to ask when choosing a memorial app

1. Is it private by default? You decide who can enter.
2. Can it hold voice and video, not only photos?
3. Can family members add their own memories?
4. Can you download everything again, in ordinary files?
5. Is it free of advertising? A memorial is no place for adverts.

How The Memory Palace can hold a memorial

The Memory Palace is a private 3D palace for a family's memories. Many families give one person a room of their own.

• A room to return to. You hang their photos on the walls, each with a name and a year, and you can walk through the room on a phone, a tablet or a computer.
• Their voice next to their photo. You can add recordings, and tell in your own voice who they were.
• Stories from the family. You invite relatives and friends to the room, and they can add their own photos, stories and recordings. The rest of the palace stays closed to them.
• Private until you share. Rooms are private by default. There are no adverts.
• Yours to take along. A full export as a ZIP file is always possible.

We do not promise that anything lasts forever. What we can say is that you stay in control: who enters, what they see, and that you can take everything with you.

If grief weighs heavily

Gathering memories can bring comfort, and it can also be hard. If grief stays heavy for a long time, it can help to talk to your doctor, a grief counsellor or a support group near you.

Related guides

• How to create a meaningful digital memorial
• Voice memos: the best way to capture memories
• Digital legacy planning: your photos, voice and stories