Questions for Christmas dinner with grandparents: 31 questions that start a story

Short answer: Ask grandparents about the Christmases of their childhood: where they were, who cooked, what was on the table, which present they remember and who they miss. Choose five questions, ask one to the whole table at a time, and let the oldest answer first.

Last updated: 3 November 2026.

Christmas dinner is often the one evening when grandparents, parents and grandchildren sit at the same table for hours. The stories come anyway; the right question just makes sure they come. This page is the list of questions. How to prepare the evening, record at the table and gather everything afterwards is on the page about how to capture family stories at Christmas.

The questions work for grandparents and parents, and just as well when friends celebrate together. Pick a handful, not all of them.

How to ask

• One question for the whole table. Ask it aloud and let several people answer, starting with the oldest. That feels like a conversation, not an interview.
• Ask between the main course and dessert, when everyone has eaten and nobody is in the kitchen yet.
• Bring two or three old Christmas photos. Asking who is in them often starts the best story of the evening.
• Let a grandchild ask. Grandparents answer a grandchild differently, and often at more length.
• Stay with a good answer. Ask for a detail, who was there or what it smelled like, before you move on.

Christmas when you were young

1. Where did you spend Christmas when you were ten, and who was there?
2. What did the room look like: was there a tree, a nativity scene, candles?
3. How did you get to the family on Christmas Day: on foot, by bike, by train?
4. What did you wear for Christmas dinner or for midnight mass?
5. Was there snow some years, and what did you do in it?
6. Which Christmas song still takes you straight back?
7. What did the children do while the adults were cooking and talking?
8. Is there one Christmas from your childhood you remember better than all the others?

The food and the table

1. What was on the table at Christmas when you were a child?
2. Who cooked, and who was allowed in the kitchen?
3. Which dish did you love, and which one did you secretly dislike?
4. Is there a recipe from back then that nobody makes anymore?
5. What went wrong in the kitchen one year?
6. Where did everyone sit, and where did the children sit?

People and places

1. Who was the storyteller of the family at Christmas?
2. Which aunt, uncle or neighbour always came, and what were they like?
3. Who do you miss most at the Christmas table?
4. Did you ever spend Christmas far from home, and what was that like?
5. What was the first Christmas you spent together as a couple like?
6. Where did you spend Christmas the year your first child was born?

Presents and traditions

1. What was the best present you got as a child, and who gave it to you?
2. Did you get your presents on Christmas Eve, on Christmas Day or on another day?
3. Which traditions did you bring from your own family, and which did you leave behind?
4. Was there a tradition that only your family had?
5. How did your parents manage Christmas in the lean years?
6. Which Christmas decoration has been in the family the longest, and where does it come from?

For everyone at the table

1. Which Christmas of the last few years made you happiest?
2. What would you like the grandchildren to know about how Christmas used to be?
3. If you could invite one person from the past to this table, who would it be?
4. What is one thing about Christmas that has not changed at all since you were small?
5. If you are celebrating with friends: which Christmas together does everyone still talk about?

Recording and keeping the answers

• Ask first. Say why you would like to record: so the stories are not lost, and so others can hear them later. If someone prefers not to be recorded, write down a few words afterwards instead.
• Use the voice recorder on your phone and put the phone on the table, not in your hand. After a few minutes people forget it is there. A voice says more than a perfect transcript.
• Write down the basics the same day: who answered, the date, the place and the names that came up. Without names and a date, a recording is hard to place ten years from now.
• Photograph the photos and objects that were passed around, and keep them with the recording.
• Keep two copies in two places, and send them to the people who were there.

A place for the answers

If you want one place for the answers, The Memory Palace is made for this: your own 3D palace with rooms you walk through, where photos, voice recordings, videos and written stories hang side by side. You can make a room for this Christmas, write the questions and answers in it as stories, and hang the recordings next to the photos they are about. With a collect link, relatives or friends can add a photo, a memory or a voice recording from their browser, without an account. A palace is private by default and you choose who gets in. It is made by a small team in Leuven, and you can start one for free.

Questions for other occasions

• St Nicholas and Sinterklaas
• New Year's Eve with friends
• A 70th, 80th or 90th birthday
• Your parents' wedding anniversary
• Mother's Day
• Father's Day
• A funeral or condolence visit
• Grandparents meeting the new baby
• A school or class reunion
• A road trip or holiday with old friends
• A retirement farewell

Read on: how to capture family stories at Christmas, New Year's Eve questions for friends, 10 questions to ask your grandparents, how to record a grandparent's voice and stories, the free printable sheet of twenty questions to ask your parents.